He never really had it in the first place - it all of that went to the kids - but you can't blame a guy for trying.
Like I said previously, I had a couple of reasons to sour on music at the beginning of the year. And avoiding music turned out to be not nearly as difficult as it should have been. It made me wonder if I'd lost my taste for it.
And the weird electronica and environmental sounds I was listening to led me to consider Aphex Twin, whose Selected Ambient Works, 85-92 might server as a halfway point back to normal, (Volume 2, its evil twin, was such a good companion during a very dark period. Like how you need a fellow drug addict around when you’re trying to quit.) Volume 1 is supposedly poppier, so I thought it would put me in the right direction, and lead me out, towards the records above. But it wasn't time yet.
Well, I finally passed those tests I was studying for, and then wondered if the music urge would come back.
It took about a day.
And what did I decide to listen to? Why, that other great companion during that very dark time:
Wilco: Yankee Hotel Foxtrot
Back then, this, and Aphex Twin, were the only two records I could listen to for a three month stretch. And I didn’t even love the record. It was just the only one that fit the mood.
But it does open with a number that reminds me of someone breaking out of cocoon (and then falling on his face, but at the time, I would settle for anything). And now, it seemed like a good transition to real life.
"I Am Trying to Break Your Heat"
The drumming is like how I dance, and it ends like my speeches do - in complete incoherence. But it was exactly what I needed.
I even brought the record to work where all dreams normally go to die. And they didn’t.
Well, by now I’d come out of the cocoon, and I had to take the next steop. Would I stumble?
My Bloody Valentine: Loveless
This was more like a volcano erupting. A dam breaking. An explosion caught on tape. But, you know, in a good way.
When I first got this record, I found it so anarchic I had trouble finding where the beat was most of the time. Forget about melody.
This song doesn’t have that problem. The “melody” is a drunk slide guitar playing the same figure over and over (and over) again. The beat is basically a t-rex stomping on your head. By 3:23 you have to choose between going mad or just going with the flow. (Of water, not lava. Damn you, mixed metaphors!)
"I Only Said"
But, like I said, it was what I needed.
So, I ended up feeling my version of normal, which I can’t recommend, but it’s all I’ve got.
Let's see where that leads.