The Notorious LVB: 1809-27

1809 - 1811: Me and LVB Take a Break From Each Other, Part One:

We last left off in 1808, and since all I've got left in my collection are the remaining symphonies - which don't pick up again until 1812 - I'd hate for you to think LVB or the world are taking it easy. So here are some chronologies to pore over: one for him and one for us.

But if you can't be bothered, I'll sum it up below:

1809: 

Us: Oh, not much. War is declared against France, so the French army invades Vienna

Him: Teaches music to Archduke Rudolphe and composes a string quartet, a few piano sonatas,  and a bunch of songs for various luminaries.

1810:

Us: France (thanks Napolean!) continues to invade everyone and their moms. The Germans respond by declaring the first-ever Octoberfest. (All agree they should have just stopped right there for the next two hundred years.)

Him: Presents 'The Letter for Elise' to Thérèse Malfatti, for whom he's got the hots. Having addressed his frontal area, he moves on to covering his posterior by continuing to writing tunes for big shots. 

1811:

Us: The King of England goes mad.

Him: He begins writing the seventh symphony

1812: The Seventh Symphony

So while the rest of the world is blowing up, LVB is writing another symphony. This time, he's back to four movements, probably because he realized that having five parts last time was a real a*hole move, even for him.

The first movement starts off with a Blam! I love the opening chord progression. Maybe it appeals to the plebes like me too much but that's okay. LVB's a plebe at heart. Just one who reached for the stars. 

Then two minutes in he's about to up the ante but then pulls back. Sly dog. But he's only setting us up because at five minutes he comes at us even stronger. And he keeps up the bobbing and weaving and boppity-bop rhythm for nine more minutes! Pastoral Schmastoral! LVB's back, baby!  

Is the second movement a funeral march? Not quite - it's got sort of a "Climb Every Mountain" vibe, but with horns instead of nuns - a switch that would have dramatically improved my childhood. 

In the third LVB cheers up, picks up the pace, and adds a rather snappy rhythm. 

In the fourth, he takes it up another notch but keeps things from getting too crazy. He must be on his meds. Ah, but then towards the end they wear off and he's his old crazy self as if to say it's the summer of Ludvig!! 

He conducts it the following year to celebrate the Brits kicking Nappy's ass.

A

"Lenny Number Seven"

1813: The Eighth Symphony:

Having proved he was no sissy last time, he's a little less of a dick now, but still thrashing when necessary. 

In the first movement, he tries to sound "stately" as if he owns a thousand acres, which he kind of does by now. But it still moves. 

The second is short and mellow. I can see putting this on for dinner guests.

The third gets regal, like he thinks he's the king. He was smart enough to not tell the actual king,  though.

The four is customarily fast - the typical Beethoven charge at the gates - nice but nothing amazing. 

And before you know it, it's over.  It's his shortest.  All in all, it feels like this one is made up of the parts that didn't make the last symphony. 

B+

"Lenny Number Eight"

1814 - 1823: Me and LVB Take a Break From Each Other, Part Two:

Then the man drops out for a while, taking a break from Symphonies and lots of other things.

Was it a Clapton break, involving substance abuse followed by long years of mediocre music? Nah. More like a Dylan motorcycle accident break where he (eventually) does the basement tapes once he gets better. 

But what was going on? Oh, let's see: his brother dies, he gets into a custody battle over his nephew and becomes very ill.

By 1820 he's finally composing more, including three piano sonatas, and he's already started on the Ninth Symphony.

1824: The Ninth Symphony 

He just HAD to go back to five movements.  Not only that, each one is loooooonnnnng. The whole thing runs about SIXTY-FIVE Minutes - at least half again as long as anything before it. 

We're in double album territory. Not The Beatles, mind you, which was over 90 minutes long. More like London Calling or Exile on Main Street. You know - double albums that come up a bit short time-wise but are great nonetheless. (Speaking of London Calling, what if LVB - instead of having that 5th movement - just had a hidden track at the end?)

And speaking of the Stones, do you find it as odd as I do that he finishes this with a chorus, kind of like "You Can't Always Get What You Want"? Typical of the Stones to take something meant to be so positive and shitting all over it just before heading on out to Altamont.

Two seconds in and it already feels bigger! (now, there's a sentence I never expected to write...) It moves - rhythmically, melodically, and dynamically - all over the place, and yet it holds together. It reminds me of "Funeral for a Friend/Love Lies Bleeding" in the sense that it takes its time to make its point and expects you to sit there and wait.

It's like listening to a drunk guy in a bar who you think might take a slug at you. He's had a tough life and he's got to take it out on somebody.

The second movement opens with a theme everyone would recognize. Again the insistent rhythm, and, as usual, the rhythm and melody match perfectly. The drunk is angry and might strike out at any moment. By the end of it, I feel like I've done a few rounds with Ali. Float float float float float STING!! You get the idea. 

You finally get to rest in the third movement. The drunk has calmed down and LVB is taking his time. And after years of personal turmoil, he's got a lot to say. Who? Both of them.

The fourth grabs you again. You thought he'd mellowed out, didn't ya? No, he's still drunk and still knocking shit over. And still upset. But then he finally hits that happy stage and loves the world. 

And in the fifth, not only has he started singing, he wants the whole bar to sing with him, too. And they do!

I've gotta admit the singers are really wailing by the end of this one. And the orchestra keeps up with them. The ending combines the orchestral and vocal into what must have been an overwhelming climax. But that's also how I feel about "You Can't Always Get What You Want" which I'll admit I still prefer. 

He conducted it at the premiere, even though he was totally deaf.  When it was over, one of the singers had to turn him around so that he could at least see the audience going nuts.

And well, there it is. One of the "great albums" - snob that I am - that I never quite got comfortable with. I guess I liked his early stuff better before he became a big star and everyone else liked him.

But it's really really good.

"Lenny Number Nine, Number Nine, Number Nine..."

A-

1825 - 27: "...the love you take/make, etc..."

He continues to compose, even starting a tenth symphony. But he's getting ill again and family issues are taking their toll. 

When he passes away the funeral attracts 30,000, and among the pallbearers was that suck-up Franz Schubert. (We'll get to him eventually.)

So after all of this, I must REALLY LOVE Beethoven, right? Not exactly. 

I still a fan of rock 'n roll and pop music. I dip into classical music like I dip into reggae or the blues. I need a change, stay for a while and then go home.

I still love the Beatles, the Stones, and the Who more than any of the Big Three Bs of Classical Music - Beethoven, Bach, Mozart.  Why Mozart you say? 'cuz he's such a little Bitch.

Jk, it's really because it's Brahms, and despite having his Requiem, I can't say I'm up to him yet. (Remember the Jaybee motto: don't let facts/reality stand in the way.)

So I hope this exercise hasn't been a complete waste of time for you. I'm glad I did it because it forced me to listen to it all more closely, and I'm really glad I did.

So rock/pop will always be first, but if someone puts on any of the LVB music I've covered here, I'm going to really enjoy it.

Anyway, let's finish with this small piece you might know as "Schroder's Theme".  

RIP LVB.

Sixth Annual Jaybee-bies: 2016, or Holy F*cking Sh*t

Will Toledo of Car Seat Headrest


For once, I’m going to get this done before the Voice does their Pazz and Jop poll.

Anyway, it was the best of times (music) and it was the worst of times (everything else). You get the idea.

Unlike prior years, in 2016 there always seemed to be a really good record to listen to. Alas, like most prior years there didn’t seem to be any outright great ones (except one). But overall things could have been a lot, lot worse.


Resolutions:

I’m always trying to cut down on the CDs in favor of mp3s, and out of a total of 32 albums, only 15 were actual CDs. So I did pretty well not overfilling the house with plastic jewel cases, but I kind of miss the liner notes.

And in my struggle to stay more current, I’m treading water. As in 2015, I managed to get four albums from 2016. I’ve still got to work on that, since I can’t compete with Nutboy, who can spin off a Top 5 list and still say that Car Seat Headrest is great without including it. So I know he’s got a few more up his sleeve. I must do better!

And eat more vegetables.


Nutboy:

And speaking of Nutboy, here’s his list:

1. Bob Dylan: The Real Royal Albert Hall 1966 Concert 
2. Radiohead: Heart Shaped Pool
3. Sturgill Simpson: A Sailor’s Guide to Earth
4. Drive By Truckers: American Band 
5. Angel Olsen: My Woman

Now I have no doubt Nutboy can listen to the six CD Dylan The Bootleg Series, Vol. 12: The Cutting Edge 1965-1966  in a single sitting, and I wouldn’t put it past him to enjoy a collection of outgoing messages from Dylan’s answering machine, and good for him I say. But I’m guessing he’s onto something here.

Angel Olsen is the only one that I’ve got and I can understand why it made his cut. It kind of made mine, too.

And the rest have been on my radar, and now that they have the NSA (Nutboy Seal of Approval) I can proceed, but, as usual, I’m a dollar short and a year late.


Overrated, or Disappointments:

Without dwelling on it, I’ll just say that Elliott Smith’s Either/Or is Neither, and Joy of Cooking
stinks to high heaven of 1970. It’s not a bad smell, mind you, but it should have worn off by now.


Top Ten:

So here’s my list, which I’ll remind you contains whatever I got acquainted with last year, and is thus not limited to 2016 releases.

1. Car Seat Headrest: Teens of Denial

2. Erroll Garner: The Complete Concert by the Sea

3. Chills: Kaleidoscope World

4. Fairport Convention: Liege and Leif

5. Kinks: Lola vs Powerman and the Money Go Round

6. Philip Glass: Glassworks (Expanded Edition)

7. The Go! Team: Thunder Lightning Strike

8. Bach: The Well Tempered Clavier/Art of the Fugue/A Musical Offering

9. Apples in Stereo: New Magnetic Wonder

and tied for 10th
John Coltrane: Afro Blue Impressions
Robbie Fulks: Upland Stories 
The Go-Betweens: The Friends of Rachel Worth 
Angel Olsen: My Woman


Top Songs:

This is just some of them, and I’m sure I’ve missed a few:
Car Seat Headrest: "Drunk Drivers/Killer Whales"
Car Seat Headrest: “Vincent”
The Chills: “Cosmic Drift”
The Chills: “Rolling Moon”
The Chills “Doledrums”
Fairport Convention: “Come All Ye”
The Kinks: “Top of the Pops”
The Kinks: “Strangers” 
Philip Glass “Opening”
The Go! Team: “Bottle Rocket”
The Apples in Stereo: “Beautiful Machine Part 1-2”
The Apples in Stereo: “Seven Suns”
Elliot Smith: “Rose Parade”
Gavin Bryars: “Jesus’ Blood Never Failed Me Yet”


Most Awesomest:

Bach: The Well Tempered Clavier/Art of the Fugue/A Musical Offering: 7 CDs, after all


Most Funnest:

Car Seat Headrest: It’s got everything I need.

Bestest First Cut:

Fairport Convention: “Come All Ye”

Best Last Line:

I'm cheating, because there’s short “coda” after this, but Car Seat Headrest’s “Connect the Dots”  ends with F*ck All This!!


Thoughts:

So how could Car Seat Headrest be better than Bach or an album with "Lola” on it? The shock of the new I guess. And I have to learn to trust that more.

It’s amazing that the election didn’t ruin Kaleidoscope World for me. That makes it rank pretty high.

I considered not listing Erroll Garner at all since I’ve had the original album for years, but it turns out that more EG is better EG.

How the hell did Philip Glass end up making one of the more emotional records I heard this year?

This has nothing to do with any objective musical quality, otherwise Bach would be at the top. This is about subjective experience.


The Year of….

If it’s an artist (and it usually is):
Bach? Maybe. I mean, 9 CDs worth just this year? So if it was an artist, it would be him.

But maybe it’s a thing.
World History Project? No, this is just getting started, musically.

A Concept? 
Disappointment? Not musically, though.

Maybe it’s the year of Things More Important Than Music, and Not In A Good Way. That’s probably it. But that doesn’t mean I don’t still need music. As a matter of fact, it’s what gets me through it all.

And for the next four years, I’m gonna need a lot of it.

World History Project: Semi-Christmas Edition, or, Handel and Vivaldi Strike Bach!

So, in keeping with the holiday spirit (not really), here are a few more classical records - two out of three of which are God-themed, but only one of which is, oh, joyful! But that’s a better batting average than usual.

There’s one each by Bach, Handel and Vivaldi. I keep comparing these guys when there’s really no valid reason to. These just happen to be records I have where the compositions were written around the same period (1725-1750 or so). But from that point, I’m just making sh*t up.

But since these same three guys keep popping up I considered giving them a humorously inappropriate nickname, like "The Three Amigos" (especially since, like Beethoven, Steve Martin actually lost some hearing during the making of that movie). But I’m not talking about Beethoven right now, am I? (That was a test.)

There’s also a part in the movie Don’t Look Back where poor Donovan plays a pretty song only to have Dylan blow him away with “It’s All Over Now, Baby Blue”. In other words, your song sucked. Christ, what a prick.

But I didn't have a third guy, so forget that.

Then there's the Three Stooges, but who is who? I mean, up until now, I could see Bach as Moe, slapping both Vivaldi


who reminds me of Larry
 

and Handel (which makes him Curly or Shemp. You pick) across the face in one swing, because he keeps being better than them.

Does that situation apply here?  Not exactly, but it’s funny how, no matter what Handel or Vivaldi do, Bach’s always there to outdo them.

But not today!



Bach: Mass in B Minor

So Handel’s doing his thing with Messiah which is a bunch of people singing about Jesus, and of course, Bach says I can do that! and writes Mass in B Minor.  (Yeah, he's really reminding me of Dylan at this point.

And well, it’s kind of what you’d expect at Mass, which is a bunch of people singing together kind of slow - occasionally midtempo. And if they’re having a good time, I wouldn’t know because they’re singing in another language.

But let’s face it, even with the language barrie, you can usuallly tell when there’s a party going on. And it ain’t here.

Now I admit, I should have known what I was getting into. I already have Requiems by Mozart and Brahms and, well, they’re requiems. That word translates into “not quite as fun as Mass”.

So I shouldn’t have been surprised.

But they do occasionally pep up, but that’s really only when they’re kissing God’s ass, which is what people spent a lot of time doing back then.

So, I can’t say that it’s bad, because it’s not. But I’ll go to hell if I only give it a B, so

B+

Here’s the whole thing. Play it on Sunday, and you won’t have to go to church.



Handel: Messiah

I mentioned this one before in comparison to another George (Harrison) because I like to play bother of them on Christmas.

For my money, Messiah beats Mass in B Minor, mainly because the latter IS IN B MINOR! Not the cheeriest key.

Meanwhile Messiah is a bunch of people singing (in English!) about how happy they are about said Messiah. So there’s really no contest.

And there’s usually someone singing lead, whereas in Mass it’s a bunch of people trying to convince you that, despite the key we’re singing it, it’s all good. (Actual lyrics!)

I’m not buying it.

The worst you can say about Messiah is that they like to repeat lines over and over, so a song with five lines may go on for ten minutes, a la:

BeHOLD a virgin shall conceive and bear a son!
Behold a VIRgin shall conceive and bear a son!
Behold a virgin SHALL conceive and bear a son!
Beho-ho-ho-ho-ho-ho-ho-ho-ho-ho-hold… etc.

You get the idea.

But one great thing is that there are individuals singing.

First, there's the bass dude, going on for a while about the good news, instead of actually delivering it.
And then, the lady - probably his wife - singing Will you get to the f*cking point? Praise the Lord!
And then the chorus comes in to take sides.
First the wives with He’s such an ass! How'd you let yourself get knocked up by him? God Bless Us!
Then the husbands come to his defense with Hey, she’s no bargain, whatever and ever amen

So it’s more entertaining. Like a family gathering. But as you can see it takes some time before the, uh ACTUAL MESSIAH shows up.

And while I’ve had this record for, oh 25 years now, I couldn’t be positive I’d know it when it’s on. But if you drop the needle on it somewhere I’d find myself enjoying it. (Mass not so much  It makes me feel like I should be sitting up straight.)

Oh, and on Messiah, I can hear people having a good time.

A-

Enjoy!



Vivaldi: Mandolin Concerto
Vivaldi: The Mandolin Concerti: Concerto in G Major for Two Mandolins, Strings, and Basso Continuo, P133; Concerto in C Major for Mandolin, Strings and Basso Continuo P134
Concerto in C Major for Two Mandolins, Two Theorboes, Two Flutes, Two (are you really still reading this? Okay, I’ll keep going) P16; Concerto a due Chori in B-Flat Major “Con Violino Discordato” for Strings and Basso Continuo P368

Which you probably can’t find anymore, but any of these should do.

Not much God here, this is just a really good album - maybe my all time favorite classical record.

You get to hear a string instrument you like and the style of playing is in a sweet spot between classical and pop. Some nice riffs and melodic turns, so it doesn’t feel like work at all.

It’s almost like the Grateful Dead doing an acoustic album.

A

"Concerto in G Major"

So, in your face Bach (or Dylan, or Moe or whoever you are)!

For the rest of us (rhymes with?) this Christmas, I suggest getting Mass out of the way early, rejoice for the coming of the Messiah, and then just kick back with a drink, and enjoy those wailing mandolins!

World History Project: Bach Around the Clock

I was thinking of including this in my Music for Catastrophes series. I’d been playing it pretty regularly since June. It’s seven CDs - which was just enough to get me through this very f*cked-up year we’re in.

And well suited musically. After all, back when this stuff was composed (1722-1750) disaster was a daily occurrence. But people, come on! It’s not a competition! They couldn’t help it back then. Ours is self-inflicted.

But aside from that little happy coincidence, it’s really part of the World History Project.

First prompted by a reference to A Musical Offering mentioned in Godel Escher and Bach, and then numerous other references to The Well-Tempered Clavier, and finally, Radar O’Reilly being partial to the Fugue, I managed to find it all in one place.

I mean, how could I say no?

So here it is. The big magilla.




Bach: Well-Tempered Clavier (Das Wohltemperierte Clavier) / The Art of the Fugue (Die Kunst der Fuge) / Musical Offering (Musikalisches Opfer) Import, Box set, Collector's Edition
Johann Sebastian Bach (Composer), Davitt Moroney (Performer), Janet See (Performer), John Holloway (Performer), Jaap ter Linden (Performer), Martha Cook

You like how I put the German title in there, too? Pretty classy, right?

Anyway, there were a lot of talented people before Bach, but jeez, this guy is just off the charts. Great musician, great improviser, great composer. Their Prince, maybe?

So let’s break this all down.


The Well-Tempered Clavier Book 1 (CDs 1 and 2) and Book 2 (CDs 3 and 4):

Funny story: Back then the clavier (or to us, the harpsichord) was more or less just invented and people were tuning it in all sorts of different ways.

Along comes Bach, who says Enough of this different tuning sh*t. Listen, assholes! Here’s my way - the right way - to tune the damned thing, and by the way, if you don’t believe me, in my spare time, I wrote 24 tunes - each in a different key -  just wrote to prove it. So everyone just shut the f*ck up, okay?

And that’s a direct quote. (Okay, I’m lying about that.) But what a badass!

And he does it very methodically. First C Major, then C Minor, then C sharp major, and then C sharp minor.

And you can just hear him thinking as he goes along What? Still don’t believe me? How about I do D Major and then D Minor? Here you go! Want more? Okay, here’s E, etc. all the way to G, and then back to A and B because you illiterate b*stards didn’t notice I didn’t start with A!

And if you think age may have mellowed him out, no. Twenty years later and he does another 24. Really, he was kind of an asshole.

But I guess you want to know what it sounds like.

Amazingly enough, not annoying. And Davitt Moroney can really play. He’s no Elton John or anything, but he’s not bad.

And it’s not too “fussy”. And you know what I mean by that. It doesn’t come with all those trills and flourishes that would me want to punch poor Davitt in the mouth. It helps that he’s not wearing the big wig. (A recurring theme in this series.)  He just looks like a regular guy.

This music is peaceful (probably why I keep going back to it). Kind of like the Beatles “Because”  played at various tempos and keys, except without the voices.  That may not sound like much, but in classical music less is usually more.

A-

“Prelude & Fugues in C major”


The Art of the Fugue (CDs 5 and 6):

This is designed music. Experimental if you will. And yet, he could just improvise it on command. I’ll assume he wrote these down first. Each one is made up of two separate melodies that weave around each other and sometimes combine to make a third one.

What a show-off.

But again, they’re not pompous or overbearing, just exploratory. You get the feeling he could have made it more complicated but he wanted to make sure you could follow.

And it hits that sweet spot of holding your attention if you want it to or letting you go do something else while it’s on while providing a perfect background.

So maybe the guy was mellowing.

A-

J.S. Bach "Little" Fugue in G minor, BWV 578 


A Musical Offering (CD 7):

This one’s more varied than the others. It’s actually got some other instruments on it. And simply lovely.

Nuff said!

A-

“Musical Offering BWV 1079 XVII. Ricercar a 6”


Bach to the Future:

This little adventure could have been a big waste of time. It had all the earmarks of being “work” - a huge rabbit hole I dug for myself that I could neither relate to or enjoy. If that had been the case, though, I would have discretely put it aside by now. But I still find myself putting it on.

So while I don’t love it like the best pop music, it does, in its way, stand as my album of the year.

World History Project: Vivaldi vs. Handel vs. Bach, Round Two!

One thing I keep forgetting to mention about my World History Project (where I’m currently reading Clarissa by Samuel Richardson, circa 1747)  is how it gives me an opportunity to fill in the huge gaps in my classical music collection.

God, I hate that word “collection”! It conjures visions of shelves full of records no one ever listens to. Maybe I should just say that it gives me a chance to hear stuff I haven’t heard before.

One common complaint about classical music is that “all that sh*t sounds the same”. I get that.

Another is that it’s too damned fussy. I get that too, and I agree. I like it best when they all just calm the f*ck down and play a pretty tune.

Plus, I think of it as music for rich people.

I said last time that I’d like to punch the guy wearing the wig and funny clothes who plays the harpsichord (or the horn or the violin, although they always seem to be wearing a tux and just waiting for someone to give them a wedgie) when he does those little flourishes at the end of a tune. It’s like he’s holding a tea cup with his pinkie sticking out. And who doesn’t want to just snap that little pinkie off?

Whew! I’m glad I got all of that out of my system.

So I took the occasion to get two new records from a couple of guys we’ve run into before, and listen more closely to one record I’ve had for some time.

And I judge them partly by whether they sound the same, and whether they’re too damned fussy and whether I feel I have to check my credit score before listening to them, which is what the theme from Masterpiece Theater sounds like.

Call it the Punch In the Face Index (PFI), or Break That Pinkie Off Index (BPI). Or Burn Their Mansion Down Index (BMI). Up to you.

Each record occasionally falls into the above-mentioned traps but one blows right past them.



Handel: Water Music (1717)

Here’s some more music from that guy we first met here and then again here.

This is orchestrated much like the Masterpiece theme, but maybe a little happier/peppier (which ain’t sayin’ much, btw.)

The instrument I hear the most here is the french horn. It’s kind of stately but not too overbearing. It’s got a kind of waltz-y beat going on, which keeps it from getting boring (but then again, you won’t be dancing to it). It won’t quite grab your heart, though. It’s like that couple that come to your barbecue all dressed up.

However, I put it on in the backyard on a beautiful October day and it was just wonderful. Turns out it was composed for a festival that took place next to the River Thames.  (Notice how they don’t call it the Thames River? If they hear you say that, they assume you’re making minimum wage.)

So it turns out it’s not for a summer barbecue but rather a fall walk in the park, preferably one with a body of water that you name backwards, like River Hudson or Lake Clove.

Based on an outside listen, this is an easy A-, assuming the weather’s good and it’s the right time of year.

But I’m an indoor kind of guy.

So, not great, but not bad at all.

B+



Vivaldi: The Four Seasons (1723)

And not to be outdone, Vivaldi comes back, too.

And we’ve all heard the opening theme, right? I forget where, though. Some ads, I think.  Charmin? Camel Cigarettes? Yeah, that sounds right.

It’s also got that Masterpiece Theater vibe but manages to keep it all a bit lighter. I find it more varied than Water Music. There are some slow ones, some fast ones (Handel never really quite revs up to, say, “Wipe Out” speed. That’s okay. No waves by the Thames.)

And there are more violins than horns, which I prefer. And the slow quiet parts are real pretty.

Again, you won’t lost your sh*t listening to this, but it’ll make the time go by quite pleasantly.

B+



Bach: The  Brandenberg Concertos (1721)

This is the record I bought back in the summer of 1983 when I took another shot at classical music at exactly the wrong time.  Poor Johann Sebastian was up against a summertime glut of pop music that was making me perfectly happy at the time thank you very much.

But now, over thirty years later, I can hear it much better.

Compared against Vivaldi and Handel, Bach comes as a bit of a relief. He’s lighter on his feet, more melodic, more relaxed, and not trying to impress you like the other two guys.

I mean, he already impressed me with the sheer gall of his Six Solo Cello Suites. I mean, who does that?  Well apparently a few people, but whatever.

Here he knocks out six concertos for this guy Brandenburg, in about a year and a half. And it’s everything Vivaldi and Handel ain’t. And those guys are pretty good!

I also notice that he keeps the band a little smaller. You could almost fit them in your living room. Okay, maybe not quite.

Funny thing. Turns out that you’ll find the 2nd Concerto, Third Movement used as the theme for "Firing Line". At the time, I always found it to be the epitome of fussiness, and yet when heard in the context of all six of these pieces, it goes down a lot easier.

So, if I were to give an analogy, Vivaldi and Handel are Chuck Berry and Elvis, while Bach is the Beatles. And with all due respect to the other gentlemen, I’m a Beatles Guy all the way.

A-

World History Project, or Ahh Bach!, Part One:

Sometimes I think I’m overestimating my capacity to hear new music.

It would be nice to think - like I once did - that there is no theoretical reason for me to not like any CD, something unless there was definitely something wrong with it. In other words, I should have been able to go to any genre and enjoy whatever was good in that genre.

I remember borrowing a CD of Armenian folk music from a co-worker and enjoying it. (Even he didn’t like it that much.)

But my musical arteries seem to be hardening.  I’ve come to find I like hip hop (and dance music and dubstep and electronica and...) only so much.


It’s Not Them:

Now, I’ve been hearing complaints about “those young people with their crazy music” since I was six years old, which was fine. At that time, they were talking about me.  But now it’s us talking about them.

To hear someone my age say it is pretty disheartening. After all, he/she probably went through the same degree of non-acceptance from his/her parents as I did, and should have been a little more aware when he found himself saying the same thing.

So I’ve been on the lookout for such non-acceptance for decades now.  And I’ve been pretty successful at keeping it at bay. Even when I ended up not loving something, I was smart enough to not dismiss it because there were lots of people who did love it. For you algebra fans (come on, I know you’re out there!) x number of y fans can’t be wrong, can they?  Well, technically, they can. I’ve heard some  terrible popular music, but I’m not going to let that distract me from the good.)

The bottom line is that those young people love that crazy music, so who am I to say it’s bad? What’s bad is my ability to absorb the constant changes music seems to go through.


It’s Me:

So I’m just like you and need to retrench sometimes.

So, what is my solution to this problem?

Why, going into the Past for music that I should be theoretically capable of understanding/enjoying,
Unfortunately, I’ve been hitting some of the same barriers here that I hit with current pop music: liking it but only so much.

My timing couldn’t be worse, either. Springtime is usually the best time to hear something energetic (loud) and joyful (guitars) and in a genre that’s close to one’s heart to begin with. And something brand new would be preferable. It makes you feel part of the present, and optimistic about the future.

I didn’t always know this. I’d tried Bach’s Brandenburg Concertos – gotten in the heat of summer -  and quickly put aside for the Velvet Underground.  It wasn’t bad, mind you, but I just preferred “Sweet Jane” in the heat of July to Concerto Number Two, which is pretty good, by the way.


Sensory Deprivation Chamber:

Adding to the general musical malaise was a general malaise malaise (hmmm, maybe one has something to do with the other?) and didn’t feel up for much of anything anyway.

So I decided I’d enter the old SDC.  And instead of energetic and loud, all I wanted was quiet.  Not nothing, mind you. Just something really really quiet.

And so the World History Project couldn’t have come along at a better time.  It just so happened that I was up to (really past) the Benedictine Monks (c. 800) and Monteverdi (c. 1638).

Originally, I found the Monks kind of boring and Monteverdi pretty good.  But now both records are so well suited to my mood.  Perfectly fine music for their time, they’re perfect for modern times when you’re feeling depleted.  I have to admit I never thought I’d be so depleted that the Chants would work for me, but there you go.

That’s how tired I am of new music. The chanting monks are sounding good!

But the WHP also brought me to another record that fit the mood:



Bach: Six Unaccompanied Cello Suites, Performed by Yo Yo Ma

This is one of Johann Sebastian’s earlier compositions (1717), and like the Monks and Monteverdi this is a 2 CD set. Who’da thought you could fill 2 entire CDs with just one guy - named after a toy - sawing away on what you and me and Jack Black all know is really a bass? They must have had all the time in the world back then.

Anyway, I won’t even try to describe this. The title really says it all. I’m too ignorant to note any huge changes of mood or tone. It all seems to stay in a zone of mild melancholy that I find to be so much fun these days.

Like those other times of depression when I could only handle Yankee Hotel Foxtrot and Selected Ambient Works 85-92, Vol 2, this one fits perfectly into that low-input frame of mind.

For a while, when I’d play this it would simply slip past me, because I was awaiting more sensory input.  But when you aren’t up to all that, this is perfect.

I won’t lie and say I absolutely love it. Something would have to enthrall me on a sustained basis to get that reaction.

But there must be a category of music representing what you normally wouldn’t immediately reach for, but under certain circumstances is fantastic.  In which case, this would be an A+.

For your first classical album, you could do a lot worse.

B+

"Suite No. 1 - Prelude"

Decade: 2003

Not Facing the Here and Now:

While the country was deciding to go to war again, I was too confused and overwhelmed to know what to think. Maybe everything I thought was wrong.

So I retreated into my first vice. But pop music wasn’t going to cut it, so I tried a different time and place - jazz and world music.

Although I usually need a few listens to get a grip on a new jazz record, I liked “The Amazing Bud Powell, Volume One” right away. Bud played piano during the advent of bebop, but rather than feel challenged by his music, I felt welcomed. So my first reaction was enjoyment, then wonder at how the hell he did it. I prefer this order of events to what usually happens with virtuosos – you appreciate them first and forget to get around to liking them. I’m usually cautious about recommending jazz, but this one if great, even for a non-enthusiast.
----------------Now playing: Bud Powell - Bouncing with Bud via FoxyTunes

On the same trip to the store, I picked up “Specialists in All Styles” by Orchestra Baobab. I know even less about world music than I do about world history, so when I heard the term Afro-Cuban music, I can only imagine an island in the middle of the Atlantic where these guys meet to play. These guys were stars in Senegal, broke up for twenty odd years, and then picked right up where they left off. The sharp guitar playing helps me get past the words I don’t understand. And again, it didn’t require any time to “get”.
----------------Now playing: Orchestra Baobab - Bul Ma Miinvia FoxyTunes

Now deluded into thinking I’d mastered these two genres, I overreached into classical. The Musical Heritage Society - having forgotten what a lousy customer I was in the eighties - wanted me back. The offer was so good I didn’t make them beg. I grabbed the buy-six-for-a-buck-a-piece offer and ran.

The first two discs were Elvis Costello-recommended requiems by Brahms and Mozart. Not party music, they’re both perfect for early mornings when it’s miserable out and your conscience is bothering you. Listening to them is like being locked in a church where the choir has taken over. And not the rollicking African American gospel type choir either. The solemn life sucks type, which was right up my alley. I still can’t tell one from the other, but I kind of like it that way. If they could wait hundreds of years for me to listen, I can give them a few spins.

Two more discs were comprised of Yo Yo Ma doing “Six Suites For Unaccompanied Cello by J.S. Bach” (link), or for you MASH fans, Ahhh Bach. Morning music. Solitude music. Sanctuary music. It’s functionally similar to the requiems, except that you’ve done nothing wrong. I rarely play it all the way through, but for whatever length of time you have it on, it’s like unplugging from this all too plugged-in world. I’m still trying to decide whether to file it under Y, M or B.

And finally, the last two were the Complete Rags of Scott Joplin. There is a – joy is too strong a word - serenity to this music that makes it irresistible. It functions in a similar way to the Bach Cello music. The former can bring you peace and the latter can point you to happiness.
----------------Now playing: Scott Joplin - Maple Leaf rag via FoxyTunes

Gifts:

One of the downsides of family life is that one of those family members is bound to ask for a CD for Mother’s Day that you’d rather not have to listen to. Such was Coldplay’s “A Rush of Blood to the Head”. In other words, not my idea. But my wife asked for it, and so she’s going to get it, right? Even if I think it’s going to pollute the record collection. (Hey, my records are carefully researched choices.) So I didn’t want to like it. But, you know, it wore me down. It was just different enough to entice me. The chord changes were less than obvious, and the textures varied enough to keep my interest. The vocals, not too wimpy (unlike too many of their later songs), and the words, ignorable. Even I’ve bought worse records.
----------------Now playing: Coldplay - God Put a Smile on Your Face via FoxyTunes

Another would-be present was Shakira’s “Donde Estan los Ladrones?” which I thought was Spanish for “Laundry Service”, which is the other CD my wife asked for. Niente. This one came out before Shakira became a major crossover artist. Although it’s too commercial and generic, I admire how she drops in a rock and roll guitar here and there.

Ultimate Yardbirds was a Father’s Day present, and it was going to be my attempt at resolving my Eric Clapton/Jimmy Page/Jeff Beck issues, and finally get into a band that I just kept missing. And there’s no doubt that the band’s got it going on. Check out the live blues covers, like Smokestack Lightnin’, but the singer’s just not there. Your assignment: Compare and contrast:
----------------Now playing: The Yardbirds - Smokestack Lightnin' via FoxyTunes

----------------Now playing: Howlin' Wolf - Smokestack Lightnin' via FoxyTunes

Getting Back to Normal For The Moment:

It’s hard to believe it now, but while the world was going to hell, my immediate surroundings were becoming more pleasant. There’s nothing like a terrorist attack to make you appreciate the little things.

My memories of that summer are bittersweet, and The Flaming Lips’ “Yoshimi Battles the Pink Robots” represents it perfectly. (link). Instead of just being pretty, it’s also haunting and eerie. Wayne Coyne’s eerie voice singing "Everyone you know someday must die" seemed like a forewarning. And it was.
----------------Now playing: The Flaming Lips - Ego Tripping at the Gates of Hell via FoxyTunes

The Drive-By Truckers are the first “southern rock” band I’ve had the slightest interest in for over thirty years. They emphasize songwriting over guitar histrionics. “Decoration Day” mixes Rolling Stones type guitar-crunch rock and roll with hard-edged country music. The songs are about disreputable people, and you get to hear their side of it. “My Sweet Annette”, about an elopement and a betrayal, is brilliant
---------------- Now playing: Drive-By Truckers - My Sweet Annette via FoxyTunes

Miles Smiles because he’s making a fool of me – this time by pushing his music in places I may never be. Check in with me in ten years, which is when I may have caught up with him. Sure.

Wilco’s “Yankee Hotel Foxtrot” had won many Best Album awards the year before. I really liked their collaboration with Billy Brag on “Mermaid Avenue”, so I decided to try my first Wilco album. I found it weird, vague and pretensciouss - exactly what I normally like, but this time I wasn’t buying it. They were going for Big Star’s “Third” album vibe, but without enough hooks. And I prefer Alex Chilton’s voice to Jeff Tweedy’s. “I Am Trying to Break Your Heart” is a great lead-off track, but it takes half the album before they reach that level again. So I put it aside for a while. A year later, during a very dark period, it was virtually the only thing I could listen to.
---------------- Now playing: Wilco - I Am Trying To Break Your Heart via FoxyTunes

Fall:

By my next trip to the record store I still hadn’t learned my lesson about balancing experimentation with enjoyment.

Arthur Blythe’s “Lenox Avenue Breakdown” is probably the best of the bunch.

This jazz record has a nice balance of accessibility and experimentation. The cuts are long and easy to get right away. The solos are sharp and never commonplace.

The Moldy Peaches take precociousness to new depths. You alternately want to hum along and then smack them. They’re very, very raw, talented and not interested in letting it go down easy. They force you into their little world, so it’s not for every occasion. Definitely pre-9/11 music, so I just don’t have the patience for it now.

James Carter’s “Conversin’ with the Elders” has a young saxophonist interpreting tunes from the masters. Not that I’m all that familiar with the originals, mind you. Although I have no reason to do so, I’m always surprised and disappointed when a jazz album doesn’t hit me right away. But here I was doing it again. But after several years, I think I can finally hear it.

For those of you who think Iggy Pop makes the end of western civilization official, I must admit that I agreed with you at one time. Having finally sampled his best-of “Nude and Rude” about ten years ago, and enjoyed it, I’ve since taken two dives into the deep end. The first, a few years back with “Fun House”, his second record with the Stooges, and this time with his third, “Raw Power”, which was produced by David Bowie. My version is remixed by Mr. Pop himself. The opener, “Search and Destroy”, is one of the most ferocious rock songs ever, and I can’t say anything else comes close to it. The primitive lead guitar playing seems detached from the context (ie, whatever tune is being played at the moment). This irritates some people. And let’s face it - we still wouldn’t introduce Iggy to our wives or daughters. But if you can get past all that, there’s a real primal joy to be had here. Followed, perhaps, by some hot monkey-love.
---------------- Now playing: Iggy & the Stooges - Search and Destroy via FoxyTunes

One of the big disappointments of the trip was Chris Bell’s “I Am the Cosmos”. Chris was the co-founder of Big Star, who died a few years after he left the band. This posthumously released solo album was getting good press, so it seemed a natural. The main problem is Chris’s high voice, and the strain shows more than once. To be fair, there are some gems, like “Speed of Sound” and “You and Your Sister”, with Alex Chilton singing harmony. Talk about your warm Hollywood-type reunion-before-tragic–accident-moment.
---------------- Now playing: Chris Bell - You and Your Sister via FoxyTunes

Bad Moon Rising:

My wife further eroded the record collection with Enya’s “A Day without Rain”. One of the deeper mysteries of marriage is how I somehow conveyed to her to not play this CD around me. Yes, I am aware that many humans find this music to be good, and I accept that. But just look at that cover! She’s got a tail, for God’s sake! It merely proves what I’ve always suspected: she’s actually Ursula from the Little Mermaid. And her music is just the anesthetizing poison she sprays you with BEFORE SHE EATS YOU!!..........I’ve been told to stop it. Okay, I will, but no, I will NOT apologize to a fish. Or ever go near water again. I admit that some of this is pretty, but I refuse to be coerced into liking it. It works well in those Lord of the Rings-type movies, though.

She also got Bruce Springsteen’s “The Rising”. There are at most four songs here that do anything for me at all. Bruce has his heart in the right place, but the subject is just too big for him, and the music is dated.

Some nice person got me “Johnny Cash: The Heart of a Legend”, one of those knock off best-ofs you find in your local big box store. It’s a shame that I already had almost every song on it. I’d give it away if it weren’t so damned good.

Crash:

And then - nothing. It all goes black. Sometimes things happen that even music can’t fix, even if you wanted to hear some. Besides, why poison the memory of the music with what was going on around it?

And that kind of busted up the year for me. I loved nothing unconditionally.

Almost Loved:

Flaming Lips

Liked:

Bud Powell

Orchestra Baobab

Coldplay

Scott Joplin

Morning Music

It’s Saturday, or Sunday morning, around seven am, maybe even six.

You find yourself getting up earlier and earlier as the years go by. This is something old men do. (Old women have far too much sense.) You might even venture into the front yard to pull up the weeds. That’s fine - just don’t put on the white tube socks.

Anyway, you’re the only one up, and you’d like to hear some music, but don’t want to disturb anyone. You’re considerate like that. So, what to put on? The records below should be more than enough to get you to when someone else wakes up. There are definitely others that fit the bill, but these are the ones that have worked for me lately.

Really, Really Early, and Just for You: Yo Yo Ma – Bach’s Six Suites for Unaccompanied Cello

My nearly complete lack of knowledge about classical music doesn’t stop me from recommending this 2 CD set. I will merely attempt avoiding complete embarrassment by not trying to describe the music in any way, except to say that the title is accurate, and that it will help you feel like a civilized human being again, assuming you need a little shoring up in that department.

You don’t need to play the whole thing in one sitting. It’s just there for you when you need it.

----------------

Now playing: Johann Sebastian Bach - Prelude
via FoxyTunes

Early, But the Neighbors Won’t Mind: Miles Davis – Kind of Blue

You’ve been telling yourself that you’d like to explore jazz a little more, because deep down you know that it can’t be that crap they play on those “quiet storm” stations.

Since I do enjoy improvisation - I was a big Grateful Dead/Allman Brothers/Cream fan - jazz should have been a natural for me, but it wasn’t. The problem was that I either didn’t like or wasn’t familiar with the songs that they were improvising from. I had totally missed the boat on the “classic American songbook”. To this day, I need the wife to name the standard we were just listening to. Since jazz musicians used these same standards as a starting point for their improvisations, I didn’t know what they were improvising from, which is what is supposed to be what makes it fun. Everything I heard just sounded like empty technique.

A jazz musician I used to know (that last phrase might sound very cool to fellow white fifty-ish middle classers, but it gets uncool real fast when he owes you rent money) recommended “Kind of Blue”.

There are no standards here, just very minimal themes that any rock and roll fan can get a handle on. They’re played in a very cool, almost laid back way, so you can take your time getting into them, and it leaves a lot of space for the musicians to stretch out. The overall quiet tone also makes it ideal early morning music, even when John Coltrane gets going.

The jazz train starts here.
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Now playing: Miles Davis - So What
via FoxyTunes

Time for a Human Voice: Nick Drake – Five Leaves Left

Nick Drake is a not very well known British folk singer from the early seventies. What distinguishes him from many others is that it’s not just Nick strumming a guitar. And although Richard Thompson provides a perfect electric guitar accompaniment to the lead off song, “Time Has Told Me”, I think that the key instrument here is the piano. Then there are the strings which are used at just the right times, and give a jazzy or even classical, rather than a sappy, feel to the music. This may sound rather awful in your mind’s ear, but in fact, its muted tone and modest singing make it perfect for 7 or 8am.

And although Nick helped me through many a morning, he himself didn’t make it, committing suicide after recording only three albums. I’m now considering breaking my “One CD per Artist” rule in order to check out the other two.

So hats off to Nick. If I drank at that time of day, I’d toast him.
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Now playing: Nick Drake - Time Has Told Me
via FoxyTunes

I’m Now Ready to Confront Yesterday, and Maybe Today: Beck – Mutations

Speaking of drinking, this one is probably pretty good for a hangover.

And no, he's not Jeff Beck. Just Beck, of 1995’s “Loser”. You know the one: “I’m a loser, babe, so why don’t you kill me?” Very uplifting stuff. Actually, he’s hilarious, and for his first two albums he uses an everything-but-the-kitchen sink / hip-hop approach to rock music. There are some great moments on both albums but I don’t recommend them to us older folk because of their overall abrasiveness.

The third times a charm, though. For some reason, Beck decided to tone it down with the sound effects, pick up an acoustic guitar and write some actual songs. The results are wonderful. Folky, bluesy, elegiac (like that word? So do I. I’ll have to look it up.)

Things don’t get loud until the very end, but let’s face it - you’ve been up all this time. Why the hell isn’t everyone else?
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Now playing: Beck - Nobody's Fault But My Own
via FoxyTunes