Children of the Danned

They looked like insects, with no vibe coming from them. Like librarians on acid.****** 

Kenny Vance

The Book of the Music:

Did you see the "movie of the book"? (I don't really care. Just work with me on this, okay?)

I didn't name either a movie or book but you are nonetheless aware of the phrase and its meaning, which is when they (yeah, those bastards again) make a (usually shitty) movie out of a (pretty good) book.

I want to talk about the "book of the music". 

What's that, you say?

Quantum Criminals, by Alex Pappademas and Joan LeMay (2023)

The music in question is by Steely Dan. The text* [Note to self: remember to trademark any/all other coin-able phrases identified here for future monetezation.] is by Alex Pappademas, and the drawings* * are by Joan LeMay.

Pappademas seems to know everything Steely Dan-related, musical or personal. He is painfully aware of this level of his obsession. Yet, it pays off. He is insightful, imaginative, and (very) funny. LeMay draws pictures, not only of the members of Steely Dan (itself a slippery concept) but also - crucially - of the characters in the songs***.

In fact, the book is structured around those characters, whose names emblazon the chapter**** headings. Some are based on real people. Some are real people. The rest are products of Becker and Fagen's twisted imaginations, all intersecting with the lives of Becker, Fagen, et al in some unlikely fashion. LeMay's drawings capture them in all their seedy glory and absurdity, thus adding even more humor and pathos to the occasion. (Actual photos would have ruined the bad vibes.)

Thus, making this one of the best "books of the music" I've ever read. If you're an SD fan be prepared to pull out your old albums to listen along as Pappademas gives his take on Hoops McCann and the El Supremo, the latter of whom I first thought was a person, I then read it on a can***** of the coffee we drink and thought it was that, and now I'm back to it being a person. So, it's an educational experience, too. 

A pretty great book of undeniably great music.

A

The Blog of the Music:

Speaking of which, since you didn't ask, here's my incomplete list of Steely Dan albums in order of preference: 

1. Katy Lied (1975) 

I don't know anyone who puts Katy Lied first, but there you are. It's got everything: great rock guitar, transcendent sax by Phil Woods on "Dr. Wu", sweet and sour singing by Donald Fagen, with occasional help from troublemaker Michael McDonald, dark/heartfelt/both lyrics. And a lot of beautiful music.  

Even a lightweight song like "Everyone's Gone to the Movies" serves to balance out the more soul-wrenching stuff, like "Any World I'm Welcome To". SD with their heart on their rolled-up sleeves, which is a ridiculous thing to say. What can I tell you? My very favorite albums get me to say ridiculous things.  

Great production, too. The book talks about this album as a great attempt at a sonic experience not  quite achieved. I can't imagine what that could have sounded like. 

A+

2-4. A tie between Can't Buy a Thrill (1972), Countdown to Ecstacy,(1973) and Pretzel Logic (1974). All different. All wonderful. 

Thrill is a great early seventies commercial rock album with excellent production. The songs still hold up. A

 

Ecstacy leans more into jazz (and guitar!) and as far as I'm concerned it beats all their later forays into that genre. A

Logic somehow balances all of these elements while keeping each song short and to the point. A 

5-6. A tie between The Royal Scam (1976) and Aja (1977).

Scam, while quite good in terms of execution, is slightly lacking in all the other categories, making it less than compelling. Long on SD attitude, but a little short on SD magic. The only great moment is the guitar solo on "Kid Charlemagne". A-

Aja is their Pretender. a commercial breakthrough that's good but overrated, at least when compared to what they'd accomplished before. A-

7. Gaucho (1980)

Ah, Gaucho amigo! Lately, you've been touted on various internet sites as their real masterpiece. I'd like to attribute this phenomenon to how "art speaks differently to us over time". but it's really more about the internet's voracious appetite for content, which forces it to run the same music through a seemingly random-best-of-list-generater, and then leaving it to some poor schmuck to somehow justify the results. (How about Neil Young's masterpiece Everybody's Rockin'???)

I'll admit to loving "Time Out of Mind", "Third World Man", and to some extent "Gaucho", but    the rest sounds like a band SD might once have mocked. (The Little Feat phenomenon?) One       song can act as a meta-comment or parody. Three or four is a puzzling end-point in their                 misguided quest to sound "sophisticated" (whatever that word means anymore). 

They were fans of 1950s jazz but by the time they were of age only had 1970's jazz to work with. Bad fusion would have been a disaster, but Quiet Storm is just Easy Listening to me. SD               embalmed. And for all that, pretty good.

At least Aja had uniformly excellent solos and highlights like "Deacon Blues". It's a shame it        starts with the infernal electric piano that Donald insists on playing. Give me that good old            unplugged piano he played on albums 1-5.

          B+

As you can see, I'm into early Steely Dan, which they dismiss as "juvenilia". I'd politely tell them to f*ck off but they'd just smirk. Plus, Walter already did.

This all led me to their reunion album. (Everything Must Go is not on my to-do list, nor are their solo albums, except for Donald's wonderful Nightfly, which ranks alongside SD 1,2 and 3.

Two Against Nature (2000)

My first thought was that I wished Donald and Walter still loved rock 'n roll electric guitar as much as they seemed to love jazz electric piano. The jazzy-in-the-worst-way riff three minutes into "Gaslighting Annie" is not appreciated.

The good news is that the singing and playing here are quite good. I do, however, miss the days when you didn't have to wait for the lyrics kick in before liking it. The music would hook you for life and you'd have the rest of your life to get to the words, which here are pretty straightforward, anyway.

Fagen's singing is technically his most skillful. More emotionally remote but also more humorous, and Becker plays a nifty guitar throughout-ish.

It's not as immediately catchy as their best stuff. But at least they're trying here. And it's snappy, unlike Gaucho, which - even now - is still just getting up off its ass.

At the moment in Jaybeeland it has bested Gaucho - not its high points, but way better than its low ones - and is now fighting it out with Scam. I don't see it beating Aja let alone any of the first four albums.

Overall, I could have lived a full, happy life without it, but now that it's here in my house, I'm glad.

A-

"Cousin Dupree"

EXPLANATORY NOTES:

         * text of the book (TM)

       ** drawings of the book (TM)

     *** characters of the songs (TM) obviously

   **** drawings of the characters of the chapters of the book of the music (TM!!!)

 ***** can of the coffee (you can have this one for free)

******  Oh, yeah, that quote at the top is from the man who would become Jay 2.0 of Jay and the Americans, giving his first impression of our heroes when he first met them. Long story. But let's break it down into three parts and assess:

1. Okay, fair.
2. Unforgivable!
3. All is forgiven.